Madisen Laughs

Here is a CUTE clip of Maddie--this is the first time she's ever really "laughed" out loud before, so we about melted when she started a couple of days ago. She really is the pride and joy of our lives and we're soooo grateful to have her! :) Hope you enjoy it as much as we did!!! (you might have to pause the music in order to hear it, just fyi.)

First Week...

So i've finished my first week back at work, and i'm not so sure how I feel about it all. I definitely miss being home with my baby girl, but it's getting easier each day to be in the office. However, Spencer was telling me how Maddie was giving him big smiles today, and I broke down. I mean, maybe it's selfish of me to think this way, but I missed out on those big smiles because I had to work. I feel like because i'm at work during the bulk of the day, i'm gonna miss out on a lot of her development, etc. I want to stay at home, but for now I must work in order to get Spencer through school. I talked with my parents tonight and my dad made a good point. He said that later in life, I'll look back at this time and say "those were the good ol' days." It's hard to think about, but Maddie will only be small for a little while and once she's grown, I will only have the memories of her as a baby. So even though I do have to work (and i HATE it), I need to focus on my Maddie and enjoy every minute I have with her because it'll go by so fast. And if I have only focused on the bad things or wish for the time to go by fast, I'll look back and regret that I didn't enjoy her more.

So for now, i'm gonna enjoy this weekend with my little family and take one day at a time. I feel like this is the subject in a lot of my posts, but it's a big issue that i'm trying to work through. And MAYBE if i write it enough, i'll start to believe and DO what I write. :) But for now, goodnight!

Labor Day Weekend

Happy Labor Day!! :) Today was a really relaxing day, and for the most part my emotions were in check. My parents-in-law left today which made me sad because it once again reminded me that real life is knocking on my door. Tomorrow I start work tomorrow...for real. But I feel that this time i'm a bit more equipped to deal with the change. I HAVE to be ready to go back because I don't think they'll give me two more weeks leniency. But this weekend was a great last "hoorah." All the in-laws were up helping Kelli and Andi move. Kelli is literally around the corner from us and is actually living in our old apartment. And Andi is not too far from us either--she'll be living with her cousin in South Jordan which is about 30 minutes away. So all of Spencer's siblings are living close by (C.J., Spencer's brother, is about 5 blocks away as well). It was fun to hang out with them this weekend, especially because it kept my mind off of the dreaded day of going back to work. But I just have to keep telling myself that it'll be okay. It's temporary for the next year and a half and I'll still get to be with her a lot during the day. PLUS, i'm literally seconds away from her if I feel the need to come home and visit for a minute. It seems the more I repeat these things to myself, the more it helps me feel peace. It also helps that both family and friends are supporting me in this decision and are willing to help at a moment's notice. Anyhow, it's about time for Maddie's feeding and bedtime, so i'll go for now. Adieu...